Editorial . . .

                          “Be kind to thy father, for when thou wert young,

                               Who loved thee so fondly as he?

                               He caught the first accents that fell from thy tongue,

                              And joined in thy innocent glee.”

                                                             -- Margaret Courtney

Yesterday and today: celebrating Father’s Day

     As we come out of the presses for this issue, we celebrate the day of fathers and fatherhood which inevitably brings back unforgettable moments we had with our  own fathers.  And depending on where one is coming from, they usually represent samplings of the whole thread of life: moments that make you smile or cry, of tenderness, strength, discipline, comfort and episodic oddities. Those times inevitably join into our yesterdays and todays carrying with them rewarding values –for better or for worse – but rewarding nonetheless, passing through the years that helped us what we are today.  Like it or not, young or old, we learned from those men in our lives, many of whom were not really the superdads or heroes we wanted to shape them in our minds, but simply ordinary men who did their best to show  the love and support most fathers have given their sons and daughters.  Our lives with them, from our growing-up years to the somewhat cocky but beautifully responsible creatures that we are today, were somehow inspired beginning with those little gestures of alternating concern and assurance --, from a whack in the butt to a pat on the back.  

     To a child, a father is beyond reproach, almost a superhero as governor, provider, and protector, morally upright.  These are endearing thoughts and expectations.  Unfortunately, life to be fully meaningful is also to embrace the unexpected along with the expected, the uneven mixture of the heroic and the villainous at times, estrangement and gentleness in its pattern.  Unfortunately, many of us have not as yet matured into realizing that the strands of right and wrong, good and bad, are inextricably mingled – there is no untangling them. For what contributes to our personal progress as sons and daughters worthy of our fathers is our ability to accept this bewildering complexity.

     And this is the significance of Father’s Day when it had its beginnings, coming from the heart of a daughter who held her father in high esteem.   She was a driving force behind its celebration and integration.  Her name was Mrs. Sonora Smart Dudd, born in Creston, Washington.  A driving force behind the establishment of the integration of Father's Day, she was inspired by Anna Jarvis's efforts to establish Mother's Day. While hearing a church sermon about the newly recognized Mother's Day, Sonora felt strongly that Fatherhood needed recognition as well. She approached the Spokane Ministerial Alliance and suggested her own father's birthday of June 5 as the day of honor for fathers. The Alliance chose the third Sunday in June instead. Although she initially suggested June 5, she did not provide the organizers with enough time to make arrangements, and the celebration was therefore deferred to the third Sunday of June. The first June Father's Day was celebrated on June 19, 1910, in Spokane, WA. 

     The wisdom gained here should be to recognize that whatever our circumstances, it is never too late to look back on those years with gratitude and joy, and to celebrate the positive and the not-so positive qualities but which have, nonetheless, helped us through life’s continuous flow filled with its crossroads, tributaries, and unexpected bends.  This moment where we are now is to appreciate the immeasurable lessons, the heartfelt and warm emotions of just being together, the difficult and the pain of those growing-up years without sparing the rod, or those times when our dads simply attended our graduation, a performance, gave a comforting presence and advice, the conflicts and the disappointments, the-hard-as-nails tough love.  And at times, in the words of J. August Strindberg, “That is the thankless position of the father in the family: the provider for all, and the enemy of all.”  Let this be an occasion where it would seem as if all the years of togetherness and absence, separation and closeness, or the dreaded final farewell from each other's lives came together with our hopes and prayers. This shared moment, whatever it means to you or to any of us, is a bond known only to you, to us, which no one else could ever understand, father to son, father to daughter.  Because it is unique: only to you.  And to me.

                                     Happy Father’s Day to all!

June 16, 2008 issue

psajr

[Note: This article will appear on the June 16, 2008 issue of Philippine Journal]

About the Author:  Brod Pio Acampado, in his own words...

Memories of the UP Beta Sigma Fraternity

My batch is '50 UPD, and as far as my memory jogs, I remember the late Pros Crescini (we were also together in high school), Tony Almirante, Joe Abueva, Godo Roperos, Cris Icban, Roque, Ananias, etc. (first names, escape me now) and many others whose names are difficult to recall now having been away from the BS loop;also, after finishing AB'53, Engl. Litt/PoliSci, I plunged right into the thick of a typical young man's struggle to find his place in a world whose appeal then was too seductive and exciting.  I was Cris or Jun Icban's Managing Editor in the Collegian for the 2 successive years we held on to it.  In the intervening years, some of the younger brods also crossed my path: Erwin Castillo was my senior copywriter when I was Vice-President of J. Walter Thompson (Philippines), the oldest and largest ad agency worldwide, and Erwin also became my Creative Director when I headed Asia West Marketing Communications, Inc.(which eventually became Asia West-DMB&B, 7th largest ad agency in the world then) as its Chairman and CEO; Vic Ramos was a client briefly when he was starting at Philippine Match Company;  unfortunately, during those years I have lost contact for the most part with many of our brods, especially the anniversary celebrations, due to the extreme demands of my work, particularly travels overseas, etc.  I just noticed from one of the group postings that Tony Panajon was also Betan but I didn't know at the time and he never mentioned it, even while we were together in the Ligaya Ng Panginoon and had encounters in some business/industry meetings, as well as socials in the business circuit, etc. then.  Pepsi was also a client of mine, but that was long before his time as president.  There were other brods too like Boy Morales, Ando Roman, Johnny Chiuten (we founded and set up a Kung Fu Club in Chinatown with Erwin Castillo and another Chinese practitioner who, I didn't know was also a friend of Johnny; that was how we met; the students of the club then were mostly business executives).
 

Personal musings and thoughts

So, I now echo what the psalmist once said, 'So teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts to wisdom' (Psalm 90:12).  This is where we are reminded of our fragility and how we are dependent on God's mercy and grace for every breath of life that we've been blessed with. Particularly in my case, where I have had this irreversible case of emphysema for more than 20 years now, yet feeling good as ever, by his grace.  So, as you can see, brod, there's much for me to be grateful still.  

True, I still busy myself these days but not in the context of still being chained to the fast lane as in my younger, active days in the corporate world.  As you know, I am now retired.  My time now is spread out to the contemplative life which I have tried to keep for the more than 10 years of this discipline, following spiritual practices in the monastic tradition, particularly the Cistercian and Carthusian orders.  And the other part of my time is spent on my marketing consultancy work to help small to medium businesses, particularly some of the Pinoys here in Vancouver.  I write business plans (but this is mostly for non-Pinoys), marketing strategies and advertising plans, etc., but I never take more than two, or three at the most, assignments so as not to prejudice my quality time for other personal/family needs.  Everything has to be done at my own pace, more as managing my health condition and keeping my mind properly fed as well as stimulated.  The work that I do is part of my commitment as a lay contemplative, which is also my way of giving back, what God has given me, in sharing whatever talents or skills I have to help others -- business and/or spiritual, even personal, as may be allowable by my circumstances.  I believe this is what God has led me to be, as my vocation or calling, so you can already sense that the business work I do is actually characterized by a shift in purpose: from a focus on myself and getting full pay in the process, to a focus on serving and helping others primarily, and any monetary considerations become secondary.  Kadalasan nga, give na lang.  And I also still engage in occasional 'ibang may pinagsamahan' sessions with some friends and a few of the brods here.  This is where the monastic, or even the lay contemplative life is often misunderstood; for in their life of enclosure (prayers, vigils for the world, etc.), it's not all prayers and contemplation; they also have a life of hospitality, reaching out to others outside their monastic walls (or prayer rooms, for lay contemplatives like me), enabling them to launch into the depths of love by reaching out to those who come seeking a much greater reality than themselves.  In the same manner, I have no qualms about reaching out and sharing a few drinks or a bottle, among others, with well-meaning friends in good fellowship, notwithstanding curved eyebrows of some misguided self-righteous freaks.  All these are now kept to a minimum, however, as compared to the my old, past similar indulgences. That is what the word 'busy' applies to my life now in contrast to my life past. 

I still have to go back and revisit the website for me to get a fuller grasp of what's going on with our Betan group.  I did notice though an entry from Brod Bernie Bacosa, UPD'71 (outside of your '180 days' manifesto, of course) whose posting is all about servant-leadership which really caught my attention and I have a feeling we can get ourselves aligned here, who knows? -- but, hopefully, not just confined to Betan concerns and interests, etc. but how this can be harnessed to address, in a more meaningful way, the corrupted values of our present political and social structures in the home country right now.  It would really make a lot of sense to take this leadership all the way to as many sectors in our present situation there -- social, political, religious, educational, environmental, etc. -- particularly that we pride ourselves of those who have formerly given their time not only in a few key higher government posts or levels of serving our people.  This is where their experience and expertise can still be brought to bear as they continue to make that sacrifice both for God, country and fraternity.